Little Snots

Brady to Rachel: "What's wrong?" She's a self centered spoiled brat dedicated to seeing to it that her dad remains celibate, that's what's wrong. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rafe sees Cat's bandaged wrist: "What happened?" Cat: "A hand job got a little rough." #DAYS

The modern, progressive approach to parenting dictates that parents never spank their children. That's why we get little snots like Rachel and Thomas. #Proverbs13 #DAYS

Rachel Googles Sarah and reads about all the nasty things about her: "Damn, she's as bad as I am." Finding out Sarah kidnapped her as a baby, this should really send Rachel over the edge. #GettingGood #DAYS

The Stick Up Johnny's Ass

L'il T gives his parents a dose of reality. #DAYS

Leo: "Scandals, dear Chadwick, are my raisin d'etre." Dried grapes are my raisin d'eat. #DAYS

Leo: "OMG, Chadwick, is this a dating app?" If Chad's using a dating app it must be hard-up.com – your only option is to swipe right on every picture. #DAYS

Straight guy viewers everywhere are praying for the top of Chanel's sweater to drop just a little bit more. #DAYS

Bekke to Shawn: "I don't know when I'm going to stop going after guys who are totally wrong for me." Belle is rushed to the hospital to have her foot extracted from her mouth. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Liam: "I don't want to take your handout." Abe: "Pretend you're robbing me." #DAYS

Johnny lets EJ look at L'il T then snorts, "This changes nothing between you and me." That stick up Johnny's ass seems to be making him particularly cranky. #DAYS

Paulina looks at L'il T, "Sound asleep… just like his mama." If you would shut up his mama might stay sound asleep. #DAYS

The Old Fashioned Way

Chad: "First Tony disappears and now Kristen. What's going on with this family?" It's just a wild guess, but I'd say people are disappearing. #DAYS

Stephanie: "I could model some of my new outfits if you like." Alex: "I definitely like." Imagine his disappointment when she models her new full length winter polar parka. #DAYS

Rafe: "I want to get involved with a woman the old fashioned way." Without his doppelganger horning in, I trust. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rafe: "I want to meet a woman the old fashioned way." Gabi: "What does that involve?" Rafe: "A one-night-stand with optional follow-up." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Lucas to Rafe and EJ: "What if Sami is just trying to get under our skin?" Rafe Rafe: "Well, we've all been under hers… so to speak." #DAYS

It's All About Me

Next on #DOOL — Sami: "I feel terrible for what you are going through." Belle: "What I am going through is having a conversation with you and you're right. It is, as always, terrible." #DAYS

EJ: "Dr. Marlena Evans experienced a medical emergency this evening." She probably got her latest hospital bill. #DAYS

Today's episode was very life-like and realistic… The dedication was just as boring as when you attend one of those ceremonies in person. #DAYS

Tony shouldn't have worn that shirt when he was painting the living room. #DAYS

Rachel: "I'm old enough to know the truth." Judging by her past behavior, she's also old enough to bend the truth. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rachel: "Did Mom escape so she could see me?" Brady: "what would make you think that?" Rachel: "Because it's all about me." #DAYS

Belle to Sarah: "Are you saying my mom got a false Lyme disease negative test?" Wouldn't a false negative Lyme disease test be a positive Lyme disease test? Think about it. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Brady: "Here are two bucks for the vending machine." Rachel: "What a cheapskate!" #DAYS

The Bunny Ranch

Scenes we'd like to see: Jennifer has to have reconstructive nose surgery after sticking it in so many people's business. #DAYS

Chad tells Thomas he gets to go home. Thomas: "I'm not going with you." Chad's lucky day. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Julie: "It reminded me of what happened to Addie when Thomas was hit by a car." Maggie: "In Salem we don't call it 'being hit by a car,' we call it 'being Zacked.'" #DAYS

Little T cries. Chanel to Johnny: "Do you think it's serious?" On this show it's always serious. Let the hysterics begin. #DAYS  

 
Next on #DOOL —  Marlena: "You and Damte Vitali have only been dating two months. Why did you decide o get married?" Sami: "We want to have sex." Marlena: "OMG, Sami, That's insane. You've had more extramarital sex than the entire brigade at the Bunny Ranch." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Kate: "How did things go with Sami?" Lucas: "The only good thing I can say about her is I still wouldn't throw her out of bed for eating crackers." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rafe: "I'm going to do a background check on your fiance." Sami: "Not necessary. I check it out every time he walks past me." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rafe: "Tony DiMera has been declared missing." Roman: "Missing what?" #DAYS

The Whoretons

Next on #DOOL — Julie: "This is Tate and his girlfriend Holly." Marie: "A couple, eh, based on my experience, make sure you're not brother and sister." #DAYS

Marie to Holly and tate: "What kind of stories do you want to hear." Start with all the juicy salacious ones. Come to think of it, those are the only ones. #DAYS

Kayla tells Thomas the Salem doctors are going to put his shoulder back where it belongs… as soon as they can figure out how to do something like that. #DAYS

After dishing the dirt in their interviews, Holly and Tate call their documentary "The Family History of the Whoretons." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Jennifer: "Is Thomas OK?" Kayla: "They replaced his shoulder but unfortunately when he was screaming from the pain he dislocated his jaw." #DAYS

I Don't Give A Feck

Leo: "Thomas is sweet and charming" And a pumpkin launching mean little brat. #DAYS

Mark promises never to do anything ruthless again… but he wants to wring Chad's neck. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Gwen: "Are you sure you had nothing to do with Tony's disappearance?" EJ: "How could you even suggest that?" Gwen: "Well, we 86ed Dimitri." EJ: "Dimitri was a feckless con artist." Gwen: "He wasn't feckless. I'm pretty sure Dimitri had a feck or two." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — EJ: "Dimitri was a feckless con artist." Gwen: "For someone who was feckless, he certainly fecked up a lot." EJ: "When it comes to anything Dimitri did, I don't give a feck." #DAYS